Overemphasis on Sports Identity
🌟Weekly Inspiration🌟
July Parenting Series on Youth Sports #1
To kick off my July Parenting Series on Youth Sports, I will re-post one of my LTWL’s from Spring 2022. It is still relevant! It’s a good start to this conversation. Catch you next week with new content. Happy 4th! ⭐
This week I was honored to have a booth at our local high school and middle school for Mental Health Awareness Week. I had flyers about our practice, mental health stickers/bracelets, etc, and COOKIES! Of course, the cookies were a big draw to encourage the kids to come over to our table, greet the clinicians, and grab a flyer if they were interested in our services. On the first day, the high schoolers devoured all the cookies in record time. The next day at the middle school, I decided the kids were going to have to “work” for the treat! We asked them to tell us one of their strengths to receive the treat ❤️. The kids were darling and it was an interesting experiment with them.
First, we noticed that many kids had trouble listing one strength about themselves. Second, we noticed that the majority of kids didn’t articulate a strength, but an identity that they hold. “I am a good soccer player”, “good painter”, or “good volleyball player.” We kept probing them to tell us more, to help them find the strength within that identity— supportive teammate, dedicated, resilient, have a positive attitude, a hard worker, or disciplined. 99% of the middle schoolers named their sports identity as the strength that came to mind—very few kids shared about their creative talents, musical abilities, or academic strengths. I had only one girl share that she was “smart.”
In our community and many others, childhood athletics is prioritized, a big moneymaker, and a huge commitment. I love sports and certainly am aware of the benefits of physical exercise, team camaraderie, being coached, and excelling in an extracurricular. I see the value as a mother and as a clinician. I do, however, think that we do our kids a disservice if it is overemphasized above all else and if it’s the only part of their identity that we nurture.
I googled a few stats:
57% of High School Students play on a school or community team
As family income goes up, so does participation in athletics (impoverished kids don’t have as much access)
26% of parents of High School Athletes hope their kid will play professional sports (NPR Poll 2015)
7% of High School Athletes play collegiate sports
Fewer than 2% of NCAA collegiate athletes play professional sports after college
Only 2% of college athletes play D1 sports, 5% play D2 or D3
Parents, it is good to have a reality check on these stats. It highlights the importance of making sure that our kids are aware of their other personal strengths and qualities that we want to nurture over time. I’ve had the pleasure of working in my practice with young adults that were college athletes…and exploring their tremendous sense of loss when their only identity in life, being a good athlete, ends at 22 years old when they graduate college. They also have tremendous anxiety over their career and life path when this part of them has been neglected over time.
Ask Yourself:
What is our family’s relationship with organized athletics?
Is there an overemphasis on sports and performance or are we balanced?
How do I connect with my kids outside of sports-related topics?
What are my children’s other strengths?
Do I articulate these other strengths and qualities to them?
How can I enjoy watching them play without pressure and expectations?